A job title given to one's self after completion of an overpriced course with no real employment options.

An obscure pseudo-science 'qualification' not recognised by any organisation of real merit, often held by B grade instragram influencers as a bio filler line.

Someone without any background in phycology who thinks they know everything about it. They usually diagnose people or themselves with little to no knowledge of how these illnesses work.

What girl calls the guy she really likes and will eventually be with but calls him that so that they can constantly talk

The only person keeping me from kermitting Suicide.

That one crazy lady who listens to my excuses

A therapist is someone who charges what a highly educated lawyer would charge to listen to you talk. Nothing more, nothing less. Within 3 sessions you will be told you have a mental disorder. You will leave each session feeling worse because a therapist creates a mountain out of a molehill. They have to so you will keep going back to pay them $185 per hour. You will always be just another day at the office to them and they will sleep good at night. Biggest scam ever! Save your money!

Holiday on November 2nd that celebrates the one friend in your group that deals with everyone’s drama and shit