The Postal Dude : Hey I'm just trying to exercise my second-amendment rights here ya fuckin' Communist!
The Postal Dude : I suppose it would have been more politically correct to kill the women and the minorities first.
The Postal Guy : Buttsauce!
The Postal Dude : Bless me, father, for I have sinned. No, really! I'm not kidding here! *Big* sinner. Yup!
The Postal Dude : The gene pool is stagnant and I am administering chlorine.
The Postal Dude : Please don't think I'm a bigot, I kill races equally...
The Postal Dude : after finding that it's the apocalypse in the newspaper Hmm... Normally, I'd expect a fancy cinematic to explain such a crucial story element. The font is nice, though.
The Postal Dude : I was pretty hungover yesterday, but I think I remember where I work.
The Postal Dude : I regret nothing.
The Postal Dude : Only my weapon understands me.
The Postal Dude : You probably thought you weren't gonna die today? Surprise!
The Postal Dude : Guns don't kill people, I do!
The Postal Dude : at the end of the game Honey, you won't believe the day I've had!
Postal Dude's Wife : Did you remember my Rocky Road?
The Postal Dude : D'oh!
gunshot

The Postal Dude : Urinating quote 1 That's the ticket!
The Postal Dude : Urinating Quote 3 Now the flowers will grow.
The Postal Dude : Entering Lucky Ganesh All-American grocery store Did somebody slaughter a goat in here? Seriously, I wanna know.
Me: The Postal Dude : Hey I'm just trying to exercise my second-amendment rights here ya fuckin' Communist!

The Postal Dude : I suppose it would have been more politically correct to kill the women and the minorities first.

The Postal Dude : That one's 'cause I can!

The Postal Dude : Bless me, father, for I have sinned. No, really! I'm not kidding here! *Big* sinner. Yup!

The Postal Dude : I know what you're thinking, but the funny thing is, I don't even LIKE videogames...

The Postal Dude : The gene pool is stagnant and I am administering chlorine.

The Postal Dude : Please don't think I'm a bigot, I kill races equally...

The Postal Dude : after shooting someone while you're dressed as a cop Someone stole my donuts, and now you're all gonna pay!

The Postal Dude : Ow, right in the stuff.

Last lines

The Postal Dude : Doh!

The Postal Guy : Thing is, I don't even like video games.

The Postal Dude : after smoking some catnip Yeah baby, I AM the lizard king!

The Postal Dude : Yeah yeah, blah blah -- don't you have minorities to oppress?

The Postal Dude : after smoking crack pipe This can't be good for me, but I feel great!

The Postal Dude : Urinating Quote 2 Oh-ho-ho-hohhh, yyyy--EAAHH.

The Postal Dude : after being rebuffed You gotta be fucking KIDDING!

The Postal Dude : Ohhh, my nads!

My Friend: Nice But Im dying

Me: Buttsause

My Friend: Pog

Me: The Postal 2 Dude
by Obammma May 26, 2020
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