The greatest name to ever exist in the history of mankind. All who posses this name hold a power deeper than all other forms of mankind can truly hold. John’s dick is the largest, most meatiest creature you have ever seen. John constantly penetrates his dick threw multiple women every night, ripping their vaginas in half, blood squirting everywhere. You see, John is a freak of a human, and you probably can’t even consider him human at all. All Johns are superior beings. They are the overlords, the creators, the higher beings. They stop evil and reward good on Earth. Johns are truly the best men, and the best to ever live. They are, gods. So quit your religion if you have one and if you don’t have one already, start practicing Johnnism, as you will find it comes with many rewards throughout life, including rewards personally from a John themself. Become a Johnnist today!
Person One: OMG I THINK THAT GUY’S NAME IS JOHN!!!
Person Two: Huh?
Person One: Are you kidding? HE’S AN OVERLORD!
Person Two: Well what’s so special about Johns? Why are they so prized? I doubt they’re really that special.
*Person Two gets fucking obliterated off the face of the Earth*
Person Two: Huh?
Person One: Are you kidding? HE’S AN OVERLORD!
Person Two: Well what’s so special about Johns? Why are they so prized? I doubt they’re really that special.
*Person Two gets fucking obliterated off the face of the Earth*
by thebiggiesmalls February 14, 2021
by cajtyhgrhrtgheragrewg November 25, 2011
An amazing boyfriend who treats his girlfriend like a princess. He has the most amazing personality and is Loved Very Much by his girlfriend. He is often hoped to be in his girlfriend's life forever.
by johns girlfriend November 22, 2010
A why not? Let’s do it, I’m up for anything kind of guy. He possesses the 3 S’s – Sexy, Smart and Sweet. He is principled, loyal, trustworthy, affectionate, sensitive, romantic, spontaneous, a true gentleman. He has a quirky, witty, dry sense of humour – slightly misunderstood at times, but he is very funny in a subtle way. A toothy smile. A dorky laugh. A bit of an adventure enthusiast. He enjoys running marathons and hiking. One would associate him with the Ted character in ‘How I met your Mother’ – because he is a total dad and can pull off clothes or shoes which would otherwise be socially unacceptable, like Ted, dancing is not one of John’s strong points. He is close with his family and is big on friendships. Loves animals and nature. He loves watching anime and the movie Coach Carter. He is a lazy thinker – doesn’t like to explain things or go into detail. He believes that arguing is a waste of time and too much effort. He's so badass he doesn’t wait to ‘remove flash drive safely’ and like a typical guy he likes to drive fast on the highway. He adjusts his speed according to the beat of his signature playlist. He wants to be known as a telecommunications operator and that he works in a call centre (not his real job). He has the innate ability to not be embarrassed by most things. John is the type guy who can’t say No to people. He will go out of his way to help a friend. He is caring, honest and compassionate. He is lovely. Simply wonderful.
Kim: Where do I find a John?
Nicole: In a textbook, at work, on a plane, in a crowd, at school, in church, everywhere, there are John's all around us.
Nicole: In a textbook, at work, on a plane, in a crowd, at school, in church, everywhere, there are John's all around us.
by Bromance May 7, 2013
by Ruddaga April 11, 2013
John is an amazing individual who takes alot of time out to help others, He his always well spoken and well presented what ever the occasion. He always as a smile on his face and makes people feel at ease. He his a proud individual who never likes to show others what his actually going on, he just likes to deal with things privately. He has the ability to know what people are thinking and always knows what people are up to (wink wink) those that cross him lose a friend for life! Love him or hate him he his a top guy who's heart his in the right place.
Girl to her friend> where's john tonight?
Friend to girl> at home!
Girl to friend> don't you think you should be home with him!
Friend to girl> no way! He knows who I am, if he doesn't like it he can leave!
Moral of the story> johns too nice and always gets walked all over..........
Friend to girl> at home!
Girl to friend> don't you think you should be home with him!
Friend to girl> no way! He knows who I am, if he doesn't like it he can leave!
Moral of the story> johns too nice and always gets walked all over..........
by Shall I do it! Or walk away!!! October 7, 2011