When a middle aged man in a cheap sport coat and polyester trousers walks by briskly and very stifly, revealing no discernable rhythm or style in an effort not to break the potato chip stuffed deep inside his rectum. This is all an effort to hide the fact he runs like a little school girl.

The two states of being are as a human being, or a hungry ghost. Semi-regularly you need to ask yourself which you are. Sometimes it is human. Others, alas, it is hungry ghost.

The hungry ghost seeks validity outside of themselves. Someone pining for an indifferent ex is a hungry ghost. Someone who arrives alone at 6:30 on Saturday night to a pub is probably a hungry ghost. Obsessive checking of mobile phones, chat sites or networks are clear signs that one is a hungry ghost.

The best thing to do is just stay home and ride it out. Read a book. Find some good clean fun.