A small town.
We have melonheads.. and they are real. Go to Roosevelt Forest and check them out.
2 high schools.
Biggest hang out = Club 711.
The BK lounge is a close second.
We drink beer.. but thats pretty much it.
We're good at some sports.
If you don't have a decent tan or aren't of a hispanic decent, get out.
Stratford girls are the hottest around, surrounding towns say there must be something in the water.
Short Beach is GORGEOUS.
We have a really good looking police force (i.e.- Officer Rivera).
If you have younger friends and no money for tuition, your poor ass gets Housatonic.
If you are a guidette princess or guido papi and cannot resist to escape the HoTt ClUbbZ in gun wavin new haven.. SCSU if right for you!
If you're feeling rebellious, and drinking at a dry campus gets you riled up, Eastern is a great option.
If you like long car rides, and a slightly diverse/redneck population, or simply are void of an identity, Western suits your fit.
If you fall into the top 10% percentile of your graduating class, you may either opt to get the fuck out of this state if you have a head on your shoulders, or stick to UCONN because, well.. they do have a good Spring Weekend.
In Stratford, every appears happy, cheerfuly and continuously smiling.. no one really knows if everyone is just stupid or drugged up on Xanax.

When you eat dirt for the first time and leave your family to build a shack in the woods