Attempting to define words from the urban dictionary after consuming too many drinks.

Mercury retrograde is the act of taking a shit whilst mooning one or more human beings. Your day can typically being going well, according to your horoscope, until you are forced into witnessing Mercury retrograde. Performing Mercury retrograde will often speed the astrological cycle forward for the individual performing the Mercury retrograde, bringing about happy and fruitful times to come.

The act of rubbing one's chest in a steaming pile of fecal matter.

n. The inverse act of the acclaimed Cleveland Steamer.

The sexual act by which the pooper defecates while down on their hands and knees and the poopee approaches from behind, rolling their chest on the pooper's buttox in order to spread the feces on themselves. The result is mashed poop.

The act of walking into the bathroom while your significant other is taking a shower, closing all the doors, vents, and windows, and taking a dump in the toilet and not flushing it so they are left with your foul remains for the remainder of their steamy shower.

When one takes a dump on ones own chest.

This is a complicated maneuver. You will need a partner, a six foot deep hole, 69 pounds of dirt and an umpire's mask. First bury you partner neck deep in the hole. Next gently place the umpire's mask on his/her face. Finally, when your partner least expects it you drop your pants and shit all over the mask & their face.