Top definition
1) The seventh track on Michael Jackon's Bad album. A "fantasy" song that is, what Thriller is to Thriller, to Bad. Thriller took you to zombie land. Smooth Criminal reminds you Sunday was a black day and has you wondering whether Annie is okay now.

2) One of the most amazingly choreographed music videos ever by the King of Pop, Michael Jackson.
Michael Jackson is a smooth criminal in his music video. In reality, he's "smooth but not criminal".
by rolling_star October 22, 2010
Get the mug
Get a Smooth Criminal mug for your dog Jovana.
2
Moonwalking after you commit your felony.
Did you see that guy take that lady's purse?! He pumped some MJ on his escape, smooth criminal.
by Pseudoman(likesodomy) December 03, 2011
Get the mug
Get a Smooth Criminal mug for your bunkmate Paul.
3
When you take a shit and wipe your ass and the paper is clean.The shit left no residue on your ass, so its a smooth criminal.
Wow I took a shit, and as i wiped my ass I realised it was a smooth criminal bro,
Bless your clean ass boy
by haggybiatch October 09, 2016
Get the mug
Get a Smooth Criminal mug for your cat Georges.
5
When someone you work with is secretly watching porn on his computer and spanking his monkey under the desk without getting caught.
Hey Sgt Jones the CG didn't even see you looking at that dude on dude gay animal porn at work yesterday. You smooth criminal!!!!!!!
by secret December 01, 2003
Get the mug
Get a smooth criminal mug for your mama Julia.
6
To nonchalantly avoid an argument whether or not it is already occurring by making direct eye contact and leaving the room or area, with a calm stride.
Carol: So I was yelling at Ryan for talking to this girl and that rat bastard pulled a Smooth Criminal!

Shaniqua: Oh no he didn't!!

Carol: Yeah! He looked at me, then he walked right out.
by The Guy With The Pants January 18, 2011
Get the mug
Get a Smooth Criminal mug for your bunkmate Sarah.
7
When a drunk guy is peeing while standing up and leans from side to side as far as possible like Michael Jackson in the Smooth Criminal video, just to see how far he can go without falling over or losing control and pissing on everything.
Sorry about the wallpaper in your bathroom... I should've known I was too drunk to pull a smooth criminal... but at least I didn't puke!
by OkayCraaaaaiiiiiggggg October 23, 2017
Get the mug
Get a Smooth Criminal mug for your friend Riley.