Generally an Indian man with a lisp and long black hair. He smells like coconut and often shivers for attention. He often falls in love with people over the internet, and as a result ends up being raped by internet stalkers.

The nickname which Janine gives the great Sherlock Holmes,
and the look John gives after he hears it that says 'haha! Sherl! Shezza! This is brilliant! What's next??