Japanese word for the act of commiting suicide. Some people tend to confuse this term with hara-kiri, wich is "belly cutting".

Seppuku is the ancient art of killing yourself if you get super pissed and can’t find anybody else to kill. Ninjas use all sorts of crap to kill themselves—guns, ropes, knives, lasers, spears, etc.—and don’t even think twice about it. These guys would kill themselves for just about any reason and often for no reason at all: that’s why we there are so few ninjas today.

But if you want to commit Seppuku and you’re like me, you don’t have access to stuff like lasers. But there’s hope. I tried to kill myself by swallowing a frisbee a couple of times—and believe me, it’s pretty cool. The only catch is you have to be really super pissed to do it.


Step 1 Get a frisbee from the store or friend.

Step 2 Clean the Frisbee.

Step 3 Make sure your parents aren’t around

Step 4 Put something slippery on it, like butter or cream.

Step 5 Get really super pissed.

Step 6 Fold the Frisbee hard (this is crucial)

Step 7 Keep folded and insert Frisbee into mouth hard.

Step 8 Push hard until you can’t see it.

Step 9 Wait.

Step 10 Die.

If you succeed, everybody will be like “Holy Crap!”

A masturbatory sexual act in which a man penetrates the outer sphincter of his anus with the tip of his beef whistle.

"Seh-poo-koo"

A Japanese suicide ritual where you cut the belly open. It is believed that if you commit suicide this way, it will let your spirit exit the body at ease.

A phrase you say when you dread something so much you'd rather stick a blade in your abdomen than actually do it.