An individual with particularly large fat fingers. Those inflicted knock over on average 5 cups of coffee a day, and could spend over a week trying to thread a needle.

When you eat dirt for the first time and leave your family to build a shack in the woods

When one’s fingers are so fat (or large) they routinely hit the wrong buttons on small devices like cell phones or mp3 players. This was made famous in a Simpson’s episode when Homer became so obese; the phone prompted him to order a special “Dialing Wand” in order to make calls.

^as above^
Also known as 'well hung' in lesbian circles.

When someone has really huge fingers. Fingers big enough to use a replacement for one of those foam hands you can buy at a sporting event.

When a person types on a keyboard and hits 2 keys at once
or presses key that hard nearly breaks keyboard

Small, short, wide, obese fingers that resemble jimmy dean sausages. Makes it nearly impossible to use touch screen technology such as ipods, cellphones, etc.