Plumming is where an alpha human grasps a plum firmly and shoves it hard into someone’s arse so their anus starts bleeding and they start urinating

The two states of being are as a human being, or a hungry ghost. Semi-regularly you need to ask yourself which you are. Sometimes it is human. Others, alas, it is hungry ghost.

The hungry ghost seeks validity outside of themselves. Someone pining for an indifferent ex is a hungry ghost. Someone who arrives alone at 6:30 on Saturday night to a pub is probably a hungry ghost. Obsessive checking of mobile phones, chat sites or networks are clear signs that one is a hungry ghost.

The best thing to do is just stay home and ride it out. Read a book. Find some good clean fun.

The word your friend uses when they don't know how to correctly spell plumbing.

That thing when you and your bros go out to a plum farm and see how many you can fit up each others booty holes.