Typically named “Logan Riley Wallace” (but not on all occasions), a phloog is a being who holds cats captive in his basement and subjects them to specific tortures such as giving them the names “Kiki By Drake” and/or Sheba. Phloogs are hellspawn creatures and certified menaces to society. They also are known for hatred towards followers of Islam who they have known for about 8 years.

When you eat dirt for the first time and leave your family to build a shack in the woods

to be boring or unexciting

A really stupid person who is dumb and not smart and forces cars to live with him and become phloogs as well. Typically they name their cats some stupid shit like Kiki, or Cowabunga