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Wipe once nothing there, twice nothing. You’re starting to lose all hope in your ability to wipe yourself. Again you go in for a third wipe. And you see nothing there you begin to panic and wipe a fourth time nothing there. This is what is known as the phantom wipe. Any time you go to the bathroom and wipe yourself you check the toilet paper. If you don’t you should to make sure your getting all the … (well you know, crap). If you check and there is nothing there the first though the fourth time you just had a Phantom wipe. Or you do not know how to wipe yourself if this happens every time you go to the bathroom.
(Friend 1 has just come out of the bathroom) Friend 1: Hey dude I just had a Phantom wipe.
Friend 2: no way, those are so scary when you have the Phantom wipe.
by Glockman1727AK47 January 19, 2008
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Jun 4 Word of the Day
The phenomenon of having to come out as bisexual to the same person/people repeatedly because they assumed or hoped that your sexuality was a "phase." Refers less to the holiday and more to the 1993 Bill Murray comedy film in which the main character experiences the same day over and over.
"My visit home turned into Bisexual Groundhog Day. My mom acted shocked when I told her I'm going to Pride next week, so I had to come out to her as bisexual AGAIN."
by Tiggy Upland April 15, 2014
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3

Wipe once nothing there, twice nothing. You’re starting to lose all hope in your ability to wipe yourself. Again you go in for a third wipe. And you see nothing there you begin to panic and wipe a fourth time nothing there. This is what is known as the phantom wipe. Any time you go to the bathroom and wipe yourself you check the toilet paper. If you don’t you should to make sure your getting all the … (well you know, crap). If you check and there is nothing there the first though the fourth time you just had a Phantom wipe. Or you do not know how to wipe yourself if this happens every time you go to the bathroom.
(Friend 1 has just come out of the bathroom) Friend 1: Hey dude I just had a Phantom wipe.
Friend 2: no way, those are so scary when you have the Phantom wipe.
by Glockman1727AK47 December 04, 2007
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