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P.E.N.I.S. Paternal Egg Nourishing Insertion System
The homosapien male fertilizes a female's egg using a PENIS as a means of giving the fallopian tube swim team a head start.
by fiberoptimist January 26, 2008
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Shlong, Wang, Dick, Jimmy, Mayonaise launcher, purple-headed yogurt slinger, purple-helmeted warrior, hanging johnny, ankle spanker, Pedro, Cock, love rod, pleasure stick, vaginal submarine, pocket rocket, pussy drill
My friend Garrett lacks a penis.
by Bob Dole September 08, 2003
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45
The appendage used to penetrate a vagina, causing an embryo, therefore a fetus to pop out in 9 months, which eventually resembles a baby....

baby-maker
bell on a pole
bishop
bratwurst
cock
custard launcher
dick
dickie
ding dong mcdork
dong
donger
dork
dragon
errector
fang
ferret
fire hose
heat-seeking moisture missile
hose
Jimmy
John
John Thomas (dated)
joystick
knob
leaky hose
lingam
little Bob
little Elvis
longfellow
love muscle
manhood
meaty
meat popsicle
member
middle stump
monkey
Mr. Squirked
mushroom head
mutton
old boy
old fellow
old man
one-eyed snake
one-eyed trouser-snake
one-eyed monster
pecker
peepee (children's term)
Percy
peter
piss weasle
prick
private part
purple-helmeted warrior of love
purple-headed yogurt flinger
rod
roundhead
sausage
schlong
schmuck, shmuck (Yiddish)
schwanz
schwarz
short arm
skin flute
tassle
third leg
thumper
todger (Australia, UK)
tonk
tool
trouser snake
tubesteak
wang
wang dudle
wick
willy (children's term)
yingyang
yogurt gun
In front of the whole class, Mrs. Johnson said to her student Johnny, stop mastrubating, or I'll rip off your penis and feed it to little Susie over here
by Adam Goldsteinberger June 04, 2007
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46
The male body part that Justin Bieber didn't grow.
(Boy) Mum, what's a penis? (Mum) A penis is the thing that the crap singer doesn't have it where it should be. (Boy) Where is his then? (Mum) He only has one in bed in his mouth.
by theurbandictionarylover April 26, 2015
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47
The male sexual organ which deposits semen. Also used for the excretion of urine. When it's not hard it's extremly soft and spongy, but if the male is aroused that spongy tissue pools with blood and makes the organ larger and stiffer. During intercourse this organ is what goes straight into the female's vaginal cavity.

This word also can be used as an insult for a mentally inept person.
Every guy envies the penis of a guy who is much larger.

Don't be such a penis, man. Get it right.
by TheSpectacularOne April 12, 2009
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48
a soldier's "big gun" that shoots a white bullet into the mothership's black hole.
Jamal was squeemish to hear that his penis had won the war.
by Sir-sex-a-lot December 12, 2003
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49
what guys use to get satisfaction.
"Mike, i was with my g/f lastnight and she sucked me off so good!"
"Thats great,rob, remember i was there though?"
"AHH! what he hell where you doing there?"
"I was with your g/f too"
by Hugh G. Rection August 22, 2003
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