Top definition
A chess opening using by noobs/newbs etc who think they know how to play the game, but actually lack the fundemental understanding and intelligence necessary for chess. The opening consists of:
1. e4 e5
2. Qh5 ...
At which poing if White is allowed to take the Black e5 pawn with the Q it is a very strong position for him, especially as it comes with Check. This is known as the Noob Opening position. However, Black simply plays:
...Nc6
to guard the pawn. The typical noob will then play:
3. Bc4
With a threat of check mate with Qxf7. However, Black then plays:
...g6
After which the noob will play:
4. Qf3
This is the Uber-Noob's Opening position. After Black's next move of:
...Nf6
White's "attack" is over and Black has an enormous lead in development.
So in summary, the noob believes he is going to get a fast check-mate with Qxf7, but any black player worth their while will quicky avoid this and gain an enormous lead in piece development and in most cases will force the White Q all the way back to its starting square: hence a complete waste of time.
1. e4 e5
2. Qh5 ...
At which poing if White is allowed to take the Black e5 pawn with the Q it is a very strong position for him, especially as it comes with Check. This is known as the Noob Opening position. However, Black simply plays:
...Nc6
to guard the pawn. The typical noob will then play:
3. Bc4
With a threat of check mate with Qxf7. However, Black then plays:
...g6
After which the noob will play:
4. Qf3
This is the Uber-Noob's Opening position. After Black's next move of:
...Nf6
White's "attack" is over and Black has an enormous lead in development.
So in summary, the noob believes he is going to get a fast check-mate with Qxf7, but any black player worth their while will quicky avoid this and gain an enormous lead in piece development and in most cases will force the White Q all the way back to its starting square: hence a complete waste of time.
The Noob's Opening is typically played by gobby teenage chess players who will talk trash during the game to try and distract the other player.
by BoomBox ChavCar October 04, 2009
Apr 27 Word of the Day
A horoscope so bad that it strikes fear into the heart of the reader, rendering them unable take action or make a decision on anything or to even leave the house. This is caused by a paralyzing fear that those actions or decisions may cause the predictions to come true.
After reading "There is a lot of uncertainty around financial transactions and investments right now, and the wrong decision could result in dire consequences" in his daily Horrorscope, Edward climbed back into bed, pulled the sheets over his head and remained there for the rest of the day.
Edward only had enough gas in his car to get to the gas station but was not sure if he had enough money in his account to pay for gas. His cell phone service had been cut off because his payments were in arrears, and since the only way he could be sure he had enough money (to pay for gas) would be to call the bank, he felt it best to hide in bed and hope his horoscope for tomorrow was more positive.
Edward only had enough gas in his car to get to the gas station but was not sure if he had enough money in his account to pay for gas. His cell phone service had been cut off because his payments were in arrears, and since the only way he could be sure he had enough money (to pay for gas) would be to call the bank, he felt it best to hide in bed and hope his horoscope for tomorrow was more positive.
by Edward Albee Deavers April 28, 2011