Johann Wilhelm Ritter used the voltaic pile with a cloth soaked in warm milk to electrocute his penis until he ejaculated. After a while he experienced serious side effects, but rather than discontinue his "experiments," which by this point seemed to have no higher academic pursuit beyond trying to turn himself into a Spider-Man villain, Ritter would self-medicate with opium to keep the discomfort at bay, leaving him free to play with his masturbattery until the end of time.

ex. (talking to a friend on fbook chat)

person 1: hey man whats going on tonight
person 2: i gotta go to the bathroom il poopt you

or

person 1: whatsup man what are you doing?
person 2: poopting you