(In a hardware store...)

Husband: "Wow honey, would ya look at the blade on that circular saw! Can you imagine all the wood I could cut with that?"

Wife: "Would you mind telling the wood in your pants to settle down?! Are you developing a manty puddle darling?"

(At a college frat party...)

Bro 1: "Dude, did you see that top that Janice is wearing tonight? Those sweater puppies look like they could use some air. I'm gonna see if she'll let em out of the cage tonight!"

Bro 2: "Slow down turbo...you need to check your front deck. Is that Guinness on your grundle or did you just acquire a massive manty puddle from staring at Janice?!"

(In a Nursing Home...)

Granddaughter: "Here's your juice Grandpa. Use both hands and hold on tight!"

Grandpa: *Wheezes*

Granddaughter: "Oh look! The Price is Right is on!" *Theme Music*

Grandpa: *Moans, followed by a grin*

Granddaughter: "Oh Grandpa, not again! Your the only one I know who can destroy a depends with a manty puddle..."

Bro since I got dirtpilled on Tuesday I have made sooo many worm friends and made them soo many little houses to get married in. Me? Lonely? No you’re the lonely one u lawn owning freak