Mancelona is a small town in the Northwest region of Lower Michigan. It's a town full of hicks where the only thing that kept the town alive was a factory in the south side of the town. Once that went away, everything went downhill. Finding a job is next to impossible unless you want to be part of the 300 people that work at the one McDonalds in town.

If you are a minority, this town is not for you because the town is 99% white. If you have children, have fun walking past the house that is sitting across the middle school and near the Library that has a child molester in it. There is even a graveyard right next to the Elementary School. That's actually the only cool thing about Mancelona. Also the 30,000 churches in the town makes it so that you can choose from the wide variety of religions. Mostly Christianity.

If you are a High School student, enjoy the numerous parties and tons of pot heads that roam throughout the school. Also the fact that once every one to two weeks, a girl is pregnant. What more can I say except that Mancelona sucks. That is all.

Mercury retrograde is the act of taking a shit whilst mooning one or more human beings. Your day can typically being going well, according to your horoscope, until you are forced into witnessing Mercury retrograde. Performing Mercury retrograde will often speed the astrological cycle forward for the individual performing the Mercury retrograde, bringing about happy and fruitful times to come.