Top definition
A completely homophobic homosexual. Like Mr. Garrison, the JarredHawkins won't admit to their sexuality, but will act upon it subconsciously by having sexual relations with various men in the dead of the night.
A JarredHawkins is dangerous to sleep in the same room with, because you never know if you will wake up with a sore ass in the morning.
by Kizzle August 21, 2004
Sep 14 Word of the Day
Micro marriging is when your partner manages your personal day-to-day tasks with you much like a Micro Manager at work.
Wife: “Have you put the sheets out to dry and put the towels on?”
Husband: “Yes. You know I am a grown adult also used to live alone so you do not need to micro marrige me”
Husband: “Yes. You know I am a grown adult also used to live alone so you do not need to micro marrige me”
by Thomas Maddocks March 16, 2018