Imagine a potato with disease from the Irish famine that plays basketball

Sort of a k/d warrior imo.

An absolute peasant with no skills or talent. Also depends on his parents to get his way.

A kid who isn't afraid to get down and dirty to please the starters in the locker room. Sits bench and warms up right fielder.

a very aggressive very kinky boy that likes to refer to girls as bitches and also loves the word "fuck"

Literal perfection. Absolute unit. The purest person on the face of the earth.

Jared Hock has the biggest cock ever he steals your wife and your bitches so mine as well fuck off