When called into the manager’s office and informed of his failure to pass

a random drug screen, the Staten Island ferry worker replied in a panic stricken voice
“It’s not my test, it’s not my test.”

“What do you mean it's not your test? I’m sorry but the procedures and protocols are standard and the custody chain is valid. You failed for cocaine use,” replied the manager.

“No, no I don’t use cocaine, I was blowing Ricardo the ship yard worker and I ingested it. He does cocaine, I don’t” cried the deckhand.

“Oh, so you are claiming the ingestion defense?” asked the manager.

"I'm tough, Mike! I never give an inch! I'm partial to taking a few though..."
"Ah, you're a real pipehitter."