a type of company that likes slowing your computer down with bloatware

Someone people turn to when they're sad who makes them feel better.

Hewlett Packard, abbreviated HP, is a corporation dedicated to manufacturing top-of-the-line malfunctioning, Cambodian sweatshop assembled, eAIDS infested plastic and metal scraps or "personal computers" run on Mongolian prostitutes' tit milk. HP laptops are as reliable, trustworthy, and totally clean of any "surprises" as much as a Hoe's Pussy. HP laptops are like used Afghani goat condoms repacked and assured of their technological innovativeness, technologically a hybrid between an ACER, a shopping cart, and liquidated, metal casted soiled drapes.

Rated worst computer company for two years by PC World.

A once great technology company that probably makes the majority of its money in the enterprise sector while designing and manufacturing inferior-quality consumer-level products with horrifically poor customer support.

A recent example is the wave of HP- and Compaq-branded laptops with wifi and video failures out-of-warranty; HP's only response is to either fix the machine for two-thirds what the customer paid or suggest a replacement...paid for by the customer, of course.

Syn: Sucks

Invent - a company renowned for its technological advances especially in the field of computing.