Drunk college guy to other drunk college guy: Thanks for being such an awesome dude, dude. I fove you, bro.

Other guy: No, I fove YOU, man!

phone: why don’t you go to sleep tommy it’s 2 in the morning?
tommy:why don’t you die you dumbazz

i accidentally lost fove hours of my life to playing the sims again

Life sucks. Get the fove over it.

I’m like so Brenda, why’s the watermelon so unsweet and she says, “I did a ShhddjkdkslalKznd and they didn’t catch it and I soooo fove it.” And I was like poah, I’m talking abt the watermelon, she’s so pineapple sometimes. I say, “You’re my best friend but I don’t fove you right now.”