Future Mother-In-Law.

The non-dirty (and probably more oft-intended) version of FMIL.

It’s an acronym standing for Can’t Remember A Fucking Thing. It’s usually used to describe embarrassment at being unable to remember someone (CRAFT moment); going onstage as the lead in the latest theatrical performance and your mind goes completely blank (CRAFT situation); the next morning after a night when you got pissed as a fart and woke up in bed cuddling a traffic cone and a string of fairy lights wound round your prick.

Fucking Mother-In-Law.

For when your vitrolic loathing needs to spill forth, but in a tastefully discreet acronym.

Fuck my imaginary life.