Possibly the coolest motherfucking town on the east side of the Mississippi. Notoriously known for the ample supply of weed and booze, East Troy is far better than the faggot town of Mukwonago (they suck big balls). East Troy, also known as ET, also holds the record for having the largest number of kids getting underage drinking tickets because the popos here are huge assholes (especially bev, big fat bitch).

Mercury retrograde is the act of taking a shit whilst mooning one or more human beings. Your day can typically being going well, according to your horoscope, until you are forced into witnessing Mercury retrograde. Performing Mercury retrograde will often speed the astrological cycle forward for the individual performing the Mercury retrograde, bringing about happy and fruitful times to come.

A small town in the middle of nowhere.
Only known for Alpine Valley.