The Dirty Heinrich means to tie a spoon to your dick with the shovel towards your asshole. If you have erectile malfunction you take a shit onto the spoon and the weight pushes your dick up for a long lasting, nice smelling fuck.

Of course its a german invention

Mercury retrograde is the act of taking a shit whilst mooning one or more human beings. Your day can typically being going well, according to your horoscope, until you are forced into witnessing Mercury retrograde. Performing Mercury retrograde will often speed the astrological cycle forward for the individual performing the Mercury retrograde, bringing about happy and fruitful times to come.