When a father answers his child's question, no matter how simple, with undesired and tangentially relevant information and life advise.

The act of extreme masturbation. You must "knock one out" whilst in close proximity to any of the following; Your mum, a nun, your boss, a member of parliament, George Michael. A person with capabilities to act upon catching you mid self-abuse obvisouly ups the ante. Ejaculation must be reached before your danger wank target comes (no pun intended) to investigate. The higher the chances of being discovered with one's pants down, pulling one's war face is obviously where the danger comes from. The more danger involved the harder (or softer) it is to complete the task in hand (snigger). The more dangerous the better. The chance of being arrested, pummeled by an angry father or having your hand severed by an arab's sabre means that you are a pro "Danger wanker."

Any sentence spoken by a dad to persons younger than himself that begins with, "When I was your age," or, "I'll tell you why that is," or, "If you were smart, here's what you'd do..."

When a father or dad starts a sentence with, "I think you'll find"........then proceeds to impress his audience with his array of knowledge, facts and information to ensure that he thinks he is smarter than everyone in the room and that you are only as smart as dog shit.

Similar to mansplaining, but when you're dad does it even more

Similar to mansplaining, but used to explain topics outside the realm of expertise in a condescending or patronizing manor to those without parental experience.