Acronym for Dreaded Late Night Poop.
We’ve all been there. You’re freshly showered, thinking about counting sheep, ready to hunker down for the night, and then it hits you. You have to poop. “Shit!” you curse quietly. It’s at this point you start to ask yourself questions: Can I hold it till the morning? Didn’t I just poop a few hours ago? Will I be able to sleep after this? You ponder for a few minutes, but ultimately decide that you have no choice but to lay some cable. You begrudgingly walk to the bathroom and succumb to the ever-powerful force that is the DLNP.

The act of extreme masturbation. You must "knock one out" whilst in close proximity to any of the following; Your mum, a nun, your boss, a member of parliament, George Michael. A person with capabilities to act upon catching you mid self-abuse obvisouly ups the ante. Ejaculation must be reached before your danger wank target comes (no pun intended) to investigate. The higher the chances of being discovered with one's pants down, pulling one's war face is obviously where the danger comes from. The more danger involved the harder (or softer) it is to complete the task in hand (snigger). The more dangerous the better. The chance of being arrested, pummeled by an angry father or having your hand severed by an arab's sabre means that you are a pro "Danger wanker."