A genetic syndrome that causes your dick to become super crusty even while you age and the layers of skin build up to the point you hear a crunching noise when you fuck your wife/woman and it is incurable. It has been said that back when Christopher Columbus came to the Americas, he had this syndrome and many thought it was known as a severe STD that cause layers of skin to fall off from your dick and they used to think his semen crustified his dick, but nope he had it. If you have crusty dick syndrome, well i hope you are prepared to hear the crunch of your dick.

A pubic hair piece. A toupee for the pubic area/genitals. In the 1700’s when mercury was used to treat sexually transmitted diseases (Gonorrhea or Syphilis) one of the side effects was the loss of pubic hair. To disguise this condition, that was not cured by mercury, a Merkin was employed.