crouching

A gaming slang term for masturbation.

Gamer1: Hey did you see pappy? He was crouching soooooo hard!

Gamer1: Hey why is true afk?
Gamer2: He's probably crouching.

by Gatman94 January 2, 2011

CROUCH

A couch bought from IKEA that is no more than 1 foot off the ground.

Damn this crouch, I can't see the tv now because my knees are in the way.

I have to bend down to sit on the crouch.

Is that a dogbed or your crouch?

by Kellibaby October 5, 2008

The Crouch

To do "The Crouch" is to do a version of the robot dance. It got it's name following it's use by the professional footballer (soccer player for all you yanks) Peter Crouch who has taken it as his trademark goal celebration. What makes it different to the robot and has given it cult appeal is the size of Peter Crouch. The player is 6,6" tall and very slim so when he does the dance it makes for extra commical effect.

"When Crouch scored last night did you notice everyone in the pub doing The Crouch too?"

by DeadlyDave June 13, 2006

crouch

derogatory term used to insult someones excess height or likeness to the footballer peter crouch.

'yo pils is such a crouch'

'Jay stop crouching around you lanky fuck'

by gert mandem March 6, 2007

Crouching

To make yoursrlf sound superior and others feel inferior by mentioning your acomplishments or another's flaws.

Origin: Using the "crouch" action to perform the act of corpse humping.

Co-creator: Tyler C.

"i see you got a 98% on that last test, that's pretty good...but not as good as my 100%!"

"is he crouching AGAIN? He's such a show off..."

by Chase Caspian October 11, 2006

Crouching Uncle

The act of walking into your aunt's bedroom and finding your uncle with his boxers around his ankles, squatting over your aunt while serving up a PBR and creamed-corn induced hot carl into her waiting mouth... most often occurring while re-runs of the Dukes of Hazard or Full House are playing on the TV.

I went over to Uncle Jethro's after the Nascar race, and when I walked into the trailer Aunt Tina was in the midst of wiping the Crouching Uncle off of her mustache.

by Ryjamin October 7, 2011

Crouching Stork

When a man is tied up, upside down to a ceiling fan while 4-6 girls gather around his body in a circle formation, kneeling on their knees. One must then turn on the fan, spinning the man and smacking each girl in the face with a hearty boner.

John: Where did you get that bruise?!

Amy: Ugh, Kevin gave us all a nasty Crouching Stork the other day

John: Must have been pretty hearty.

Amy: Yeah

by Sir John Kensington March 6, 2011