a high-density protein and fiber bar that, when eaten, helps your body generate many a milk wheeze. good for both climbing mountains and clearing entire office floors.

A pubic hair piece. A toupee for the pubic area/genitals. In the 1700’s when mercury was used to treat sexually transmitted diseases (Gonorrhea or Syphilis) one of the side effects was the loss of pubic hair. To disguise this condition, that was not cured by mercury, a Merkin was employed.

A Clif Bar is a high-energy bar eaten by athletes and other active people.

When a girl wears yoga pants that that makes her ass look amazing... But when you take them off of her you find out it was all a lie...Just like the energy bar it is named after.... The first time you saw a Clif Bar your first thought was wow this package looks awesome this is going to be the best thing ever!!! Im going to go climb a mountain after eating this!! Then you open the package and find something that looks like a dried up turd... then you take a bight and it taste like one too... Giving you a Huge Let down....