The closest a person can get to God. A Claus is usually someone with a large penis, very attractive, etc. He is the best in everything, and nothing or no one can compare to him.

Similarly to "on god" this term is used to emphasis the truth and to express the fact that the individual will not be on the naughty list for lying. The term is most commonly used during the holiday seasons.

Where do I even start on this one.... Claus is DA FLIPPING MAN OF GOD. He is also the most random person that exists nowadays. Here is how it all began: Claus decided to leave his non-random followers, and here is how it went:

Follower #1: Where is Claus?

Follower #2: He is flying into outer space.

Follower #1: WHAT? He bought a rocket?

Follower #2: No, he's been building one.
(I love you if you get the reference)

And that is how how Claus took his two wives, his children and his goat Clausishia and flew away. After countless nights he reached a very random looking planet in the Milky Way. The Clasanian family landed there and realised that it was a very random country with very random people living there. Since Claus is basically a millionaire, he built somewhere around 400000 bridges there so that everyone would have a place to stay. He sold his rocket and bought a bunch of cardboard boxes for his family. That very same day, the Clausanian family got robbed and were left with nothing. And that is how they ended up living under the Clausanian bridges. However, the people found Claus attractive, and made him their CEO. Claus named the planet after him, and it became the Random Land Of Clausania. And that is how Claus became CLAUS-THE-RANDOM-MAN-OF-GOD.

verb to hit another man in the genitals

pronunciation rhymes with house

The man who's banging your girl around the holidays. Or who shows up during the year to give your girl the gift of a good f**king.

Satan claus is the true villian behind XXXmas. He delivers grief and pain to all the bad little boys and girls. He’ll burn down houses and make it look like it was the christmas lights. It was his reindeer that ran over grandma. He’ll shove coal so far up your stocking you'll be coughing up diamonds. Do not try to start a raging inferno fire in the fireplace to keep him out, because he likes it hot. Close the flu and board up the chimney, ‘cause Satan Claus is on his way.

The Xmas song:
He knows when your are sleeping,
He knows when you're on the can,
He'll hunt you down and blast your ass from here to Pakistan.
You better not breathe, you better not move,
You're better off dead, I'm telling you, dude.
Santa Claus is gunning you down!

a rich & evil person taking care of the poor and needy not because it's good for them but because it's good for his own will.