When all forces combine to create the ultimate meth child, grown yet completely dulled and retarded, the creature would be known as "captain autism". When "it" finds a new victim to splooge its flem, and beat off to, it is known as the Captain Effect. Where the victim can no longer escape this new found growth of a creature attempting to suck the victim off at the force of a thousand suns

Having a wank with on finger like capitan hooked , perfect for those with only 1 digit.

Much like "The Houddini", during intercourse the male should spit on her back to create the impression of him being "finished", then when she turns round he spunks in her eye. From this, he should then kick her like as to ensure that she is covering one eye whilst simultaneously hopping and yelling "aaargh", much like a pirate.

Based on the true story of the pirates who control the Horn of Africa, the captain Phillips is the act of sticking Somalian weapons in your partners genitals followed by screaming "I am the captain now!!!"

A shot of Absolut Vodka either mixed or chased with Captain Morgan spiced rum.

mainly the most awesome thing in the world but more frequently known as tom.

Given to someone who is desperate to be captain but isn’t good enough. Usually given out of pity. No one pays attention to them no matter how much they want it.