The Bathtub Treatment is actually a collection of treatments for the body of a significant other after he or she passes away. Once she does, one must immediately take her body and preserve it in a bathtub with ethanol. The advantage of this, is that the body will always be preserved and ready for sex after proper preparation. In order to prepare for sex with the deceased significant other, she must be warmed. This is accomplished by placing a standard Ball Park hot dog into the microwave for approximately 45 seconds. Once the hot dog has been heated, it is placed into the vagina where thermodynamics will warm the surrounding area. After about ten minutes, your favorite vagina is ready for sex. Due to the hot dog's grease and warmth, the vagina is now wet and eager for you engorged penis. At this point, you should have sex, then clean yourself and your partner. Replace her in the bathtub and repeat as necessary. Remember to top off the ethanol as it evaporates rapidly. Investing in a bathtub cover would be most frugal.

Anatidaephobia is defined as a pervasive, irrational fear that one is being watched by a duck. The anatidaephobic individual fears that no matter where they are or what they are doing, a duck watches.

Anatidaephobia is derived from the Greek word "anatidae", meaning ducks, geese or swans and "phobos" meaning fear.