An elderly individual who annoys the general public by going through what is left of their life in a ridiculously slow fashion. Tasks at which a BAGEL is expert at annoying those around him/her include: driving too slow in the hammer lane, taking too long at the checkout line by counting pennies from a change purse, asking if coupons are still valid (when you are behind them in line and really have to take a monster dump).

Conversely, bagels are a constant source of good humor. This is especially the case when the BAGEL in question is confused about a mundane, day-to-day task, such as the attempted mastry of modern-day technical equipment, gas pumps, and the like. A supremely entertaining example of CONFUSED BAGEL usually involves cellular phones.
Shouted to a BAGEL in a car: "Fucking BAGEL!!!! MOOOOOVE!!!"

by Birky 8.5 July 02, 2007
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a derogetory name for a jewish male (usally teenager)
Bagel stole my lunch money again!
by GB 23 March 27, 2005
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Bagel Girl. A girl with a youthful face but a mature and curvaceous body.
Baby girl’s a bagel with her glamour body baby face.
by Jinxii February 27, 2011
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A round thing with a hole, but not a doughnut because it's not all pretty and cool and stuff like that...
What are you doing with that bagel?!?!?!?!?!
by YoMamma February 22, 2003
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"bagels" is a term to use when an older womans boobs are sagging very low.
oh my good look at ms. connies bagels! they are practically in her oven!
by hot cheetos January 09, 2013
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