That one autistic kid whos hand writing looks like something from ancient fucking china
Joe: what the fuck dose that say in your book
Alfie:I can't read it sorry
by Tesco discount Isle November 12, 2019
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Alfie is a peng ting and he is a true fittie. So cute but he loves to bully his girlfriend. He always says he is ugly and a gimp but he is rlly not. If u become close with him he is the best boyfriend ever. But never be mistaken because Alfie can lie A LOT. Mostly to keep you safe or just because the truth is too embarrassing.
“Omg Alfie said he has a big dick”
“Girl he’s lying”
by Ellie748258 April 04, 2020
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Usually stinky and ugly, likes girls younger than him. He talks a load of rubbish all of the time and believes he is the baddest on the road
by Jacob nob nob May 17, 2019
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I don't know why everybody who has seen a terrible movie immediately defines a word by that terrible movie. But before Jude Law took a crap all over the cinematic arts, an "alfie" was and always will be a "dog fart." Dog farts smell way worse than human farts. But dogs are better than humans because by-and-large they are much less harmful than humans are. So though their powers of farting assault our olfactory perceptions to the extreme, we have come up with a word that seems nice since the offense comes from the butts of Gods noblest creatures- the dog, K-9 Magee, man's best friend and companion. Hence an alfie is, was, and always will be what we call a dog fart.
Bandido alfied all over Alexandra!

Rosie laid an alfie, and I think it killed Alexandra!

Grandpa didn't fart, Fi-Fi alfied!

I put a butt plug in Max to keep the alfies at bay!
by ledphloydgeuse December 21, 2012
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Thinks he's an intellectual. But mainly he's alright. He has a big booty though so we allow it.
Alfie: Look at me I'm clever.
Me: Shut up Alfie you're dumb and you just think you're brighter than you really are. But man, you're ass is fat so I'll allow you.
by oat that kid May 27, 2019
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