A level of drunkenness characterized by a total lapse of lucidity, a lack of logical thinking, and a tendency to post meaningless philosophical dribble to one's story. From least to greatest, the scale of drunkenness goes: Buzzed, Tipsy, Drunk, Wasted, Alexed.

The act of extreme masturbation. You must "knock one out" whilst in close proximity to any of the following; Your mum, a nun, your boss, a member of parliament, George Michael. A person with capabilities to act upon catching you mid self-abuse obvisouly ups the ante. Ejaculation must be reached before your danger wank target comes (no pun intended) to investigate. The higher the chances of being discovered with one's pants down, pulling one's war face is obviously where the danger comes from. The more danger involved the harder (or softer) it is to complete the task in hand (snigger). The more dangerous the better. The chance of being arrested, pummeled by an angry father or having your hand severed by an arab's sabre means that you are a pro "Danger wanker."

Taking free stuff under false pretenses; not coming through on your e-thuggery

Sometimes when a person says something so fucking ridiculous that you think the person is trolling, but in reality that person is just that person.

Totally messing up a simple mechanical task and endangering lives in the process