Albert

The act of extreme masturbation. You must "knock one out" whilst in close proximity to any of the following; Your mum, a nun, your boss, a member of parliament, George Michael. A person with capabilities to act upon catching you mid self-abuse obvisouly ups the ante. Ejaculation must be reached before your danger wank target comes (no pun intended) to investigate. The higher the chances of being discovered with one's pants down, pulling one's war face is obviously where the danger comes from. The more danger involved the harder (or softer) it is to complete the task in hand (snigger). The more dangerous the better. The chance of being arrested, pummeled by an angry father or having your hand severed by an arab's sabre means that you are a pro "Danger wanker."

A guy who rolls with the punches and laughs at himself before he laughs at others is an Albert. An Albert is one of the most thoughtful, kind, sexy human beings on earth. Most Alberts serve their country and give selfishly, not expecting anything in return. In addition, Alberts are fun, smart, incredibly hot and are great with animals (especially monkeys). There should be more Alberts in the world. To know an Albert is to love an Albert, so those with something bad to say, haven't met a true one yet.

Albert

adjective.

1. having beauty; possessing qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc.; delighting the senses or mind
2. excellent of its kind

Albert is a relaxed,cool,sexy,smoking hot dude that u will fall in love with instantly but don't want to fuck with or just make him pissed or u out. Albert can also be sweet,nice, and loving. It is very easy to fall in love with an Albert.

A musically gifted and talented genius. A consummate perfectionist, especially when it applies to his his craft of music. He is fiercely loyal and protective of the ones he loves, like that of a lion, protecting his lair. He is extremely intelligent and articulate and can use his words like a sword if he needs to do so. An astute observer of life. He knows and sees things that the average person may miss. His mate must be equally yoked with him in his intelligence, spirituality, sensuality and intensity, or for him, life would be mundane. He is a true black diamond in the rough. Do not let the exterior fool you! He is an extremely rare gem that can only truly be appreciated by one who knows his true value.......priceless beyond measure!! Finally, Albert is a man who can make his Janice feel as if she is perfect, when they both know she is not. He lets her know constantly, that she is perfect for HIM!! That's my Al.......

A quiet shy cute guy who is unique and doesn't conform. He listens to badass bands and extremely smart and funny. He is good to his friends, and is always true to himself. Alberts is the best person to ever have around.