Skip to main content

Emotional Masturbation

Making negative comment about oneself expecting a positive and opposite rmark from another
Nicholas: I'm fat
Bob: Yes you are, I'm not falling for that Emotional Masturbation
Nicholas: *Cries olive oil tears*
by d_Firefox_b March 7, 2023
mugGet the Emotional Masturbation mug.

Rythmic masturbation

When you hear or are listening to a catchy song or piece of music while fapping, and start moving your hand to the beat. You will often be able to hold your load longer which os always a plus.
"Turn of jacob i really want to blow my load before mum walks in, this rythmic masturbation is really annoying."
by Butt plug joey March 21, 2017
mugGet the Rythmic masturbation mug.

academic masturbation

The practice in which professors and teachers find new ways to talk about hypothetical and unpractical solutions to nonexistent problems or scenarios. Simultaneous waste of taxpayer money may or may not be present depending on the type of institution.
This new class is a huge waste of time; the professor loves academic masturbation, but hasn't actually taught us anything useful.
by bob seeply December 13, 2016
mugGet the academic masturbation mug.

holy masturbation

After the occurrence of a massive dry spell, one must partake in the holy masturbation which is the act of sitting in a confessional using holy water as lube as the priest blesses your act of satisfaction
Im sorry father for I have sinned I haven’t gotten laid in 4 years. I must partake in holy masturbation.
by Dman1011 February 21, 2023
mugGet the holy masturbation mug.

Big Masturbation

The forces at work trying to make me watch porn and play with my innocent Christian penis. The sex industry equivalent of Big Pharma
Me: Big Masturbation has no impact on me. I don't even do pre-marital handholding
My penis: Get PornHub Premium
by FuzzyDanglers April 23, 2020
mugGet the Big Masturbation mug.

oregon masturbator

Magbots is the Oregon masturbator.
by Podesta XD June 9, 2018
mugGet the oregon masturbator mug.

email masturbate

The act of sending yourself an email.
Can I use your computer to email masturbate? I need to remind myself of something for tomorrow.
by fbunky November 14, 2013
mugGet the email masturbate mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email