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jesus goggles

If you say that someone is wearing Jesus goggles, you mean that that person has been so on fire for God that they think someone is more sexually attractive because they too have the same level of passion for Jesus instilled in their heart:
"How did you manage to get such a beautiful girlfriend when you look how you do?"
"Brah pls- Jesus is my wingman"

""Why is she dating him, he ain't fly"
"Ahh man homie, she must have her jesus goggles on tiggggghhhtttt"
"Ahmen to that"
"Mmmmhmmm"
by uj6tyjhvj March 29, 2015
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khaki jesus

Khaki Jesus aka Steve Irwin. He is the only person to rock a pair of generic khakis
Friend 1: have you ever heard of Steve Irwin

Friend 2: do you mean khaki Jesus
by Gopackmc September 28, 2020
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australian jesus

Australian Jesus is a white guy with long hair who heads his own cult in the Australian outback. He appeals to monied persons, and ignores the poor. He convinces them to leave their families, show up in Australia (if they're foreigners), and place their monies in the palm. Then, he puts them into a heightened emotional state that makes them cry. If you wish to abandon all that is good and true in life, and then cry, then you are encouraged to seek out the cult of Australian Jesus.
Example for Australian Jesus:

"You don't believe in Jesus!?"
"No, of course I believe in Him. He's that one fella in Australia."
by James Headfield March 10, 2020
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on baby jesus

somebody: you lying
me: on baby jesus i aint lyin
ian trippin on baby jesus
on baby jesus yhu mad weird 🥱💯.
by Ty💀 September 18, 2020
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Raccoon Jesus

A (God) that is praised by Racc Clan, is extremely powerful and is one of the most powerful creation in the universe.

Chosen every 1000 years by a chosen member of Racc Clan. The commander and chief of Racc clan
He is as powerful as Raccoon Jesus
by RaccBoi November 16, 2019
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jesus fetish

1. a simp for Jesus, very Catholic maybe too much. Probably very overbearing to talk to.

2. If you have such a fetish, why and please consider seeing a psychiatrist, you sick fuck.
Son: Father, I think I've developed a fetish for our only Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Father: It's great to hear that you have faith in God no-, Wait what?

Son: A Jesus fetish, Father!

Father: What the fuck is wrong with you? Get the fuck out of my house, you're not my son anymore I'm disowning you.
by Kazariiiiiiiiiiii-chan July 2, 2022
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jesus seam

The Jesus seam is the vertical hemispherical ridge across a man's testicles implying this is where God welded or stitched him together.
I got kicked right in the balls so hard I thought I split my Jesus seam.
by Sicrowell May 19, 2016
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