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The Blind Monkey

if yo momma ask you “hand me that remote right there” & you mumble “you better ask the blind monkey” that “ask the blind monkey” shit replaces the look you give her when she saying bullshit before she pop yo ass
“you’re late to class again, i’ll be making a phone call to your mother asking why you’re always late” okay bitch you better ask the blind monkey
by swagmastermf November 22, 2021
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Buying a monkey

A situation in which someone who has recently come into a very large sum of money goes and buys weird, unusual, or taboo things, simply because they can. The phrase itself is derived from Michael Jackson, who bought a pet chimpanzee named Bubbles in the 80's following the success of his album Thriller.
Person 1: I've just fucking won 20 million in the lottery

Person 2: Man, that's a lot of money, what are you going to buy?

Person 1: I'm buying a monkey.
by rollacethejazzmaster September 5, 2021
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Monkey balls

Hairy big blacks balls that can fit in your grandmother’s mouth.
by CallMeSlippy January 5, 2022
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monkey hustling

What junkies do in Mount Vernon NY.They put a few pennies in a cup,come up to you,rattle the cup and say "Help a brother out". They get enough change from
several people and go buy a bag a dope.
One narc said to he other narc"Yeah the monkey hustling are out on forth avenue is fierce today"
by Joedecop September 20, 2014
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absolute monkey

by Tc_goldie December 2, 2020
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Titi monkey

Men with the initials A.B or T.B
by Super Operator February 20, 2024
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fuck a monkeys bleeding butthole

Phrase spoken in times of shock, awe or disbelief, started by a man in middle tn after he witnessed another man witness the brutal gang rape of a female monkey by several males... He watched indifferently but offered no aid to the helpless monkey or her bleeding butthole....
Well fuck a monkeys bleeding butthole... I just shit my pants again for god sakes... Never trust a fart....
by Eviljay666 February 10, 2023
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