dirty bed

Commonly referred to when an over weight male has a weak boner and is then sat on by his fat wife in bed. This causes him to take a giant shit from the excitement, resulting in a duo of snow angle activity in the pile of excess body fluids.

I was in the middle of a porn video, when my grandmother called me asking if i could wipe her ass cause she's so fat she can't reach around. My wife Judy jumped on my 2 inch junk, causing an instant dirty bed.

by MethDuck February 21, 2014

jizz bed

The bed in which one jizzes upon their partner, or has their partner jizz upon them.

Guy A: Last night my girlfriend totally ruined my bed sheets.

Guy B: Oh yeah, looks like you got a jizz bed!

by Andrea Sheikha June 29, 2011

Bed shuffle

The little dance you do when you first get into bed and its freezing cold and you need to warm your spot up.

It was so cold last night I must have done and 5 min bed shuffle

by Emnor January 22, 2016

Bed Strength

1: When you are so weak, it's as if you have just woken up moments before.
2: When you are sexually fit.

Guy 1: Hey man, can you help me with this couch?
Guy 2: Sorry man, I can't right now, I'm having some serious issues with some bed strength right now.

by spike117 February 24, 2012

bed carting

The term for waking up in the morning and lying in your bed until you go back to sleep because you're too lazy to get up.

"Dude, I was bed carting til about 2pm today, so that's why I missed your party...Yeah, I know I'm lazy."

by Summer Green June 24, 2008

Bed paralysis

The inability (if only psychosomatically) to move after experiencing a state of fatigue through the day.

“Laura isn’t going to be joining us, she has bed paralysis.”

by Saph-69 September 11, 2021

sweat the bed

When one has spent the night before on Drugs / Drink , (or simply turned the room temperature to tropical) so upon waking feels a certain moistness in the sheets - Have you urinated , no , you've sweat the bed.

After a night out on the town with the boys, Gary woke up in damn sheets, hoping he had sweat the bed , not pissed himself

by Wavy tree September 21, 2016