Salty Toupee

two middle aged men jack off onto each others balding spots on their head.

i walked in on my grandpa getting a salty toupee

by properperversions September 6, 2012

salty simon

When a man is very certain that he's getting a sexual opportunity, but is unable and/or unwilling to wash off his manhood beforehand. His penis is a 'salty simon'.

I hate that she makes me work so hard for a bit of loving. To balance things out a bit, I'm going to present her with a salty simon.

by franc black May 5, 2013

Salty Gurgle

The sound a person makes when trying not to swallow ejaculate.

"I heard through the grapevine you gave Betty a salty gurgle last night."

"Yeah, she wouldn't even try to swallow it!"

by Gurglemeister January 13, 2009

Salty Mario

1.term used when describing a total jerkwad who always uses to much salt.

2.used to anger said jerkwad when he is upset.

3.when a girl puts salt on a mans penis and shouts MAMIAH

Stop being such a Salty Mario man.

by Norvill Rogers January 23, 2015

Salty Cheerios

When a man dips his genitals into a bowl of cheerios and milk and his partner proceeds to eat and suck the milky cheerios off of his genitals.

"Hey baby its too early to do missionary" "Okay! Let's do the salty cheerios!"

by Colonel Sanders III July 1, 2011

salty pats

The act of pulling down your pants, sitting on someone's face, and forcefully rubbing your rectum and testicles on the person's face until they can escape.

Did you hear about Peyton Manning? Apparently when he was in college he gave a female trainer the salty pats.

by Jkc0722 March 6, 2016

salty butts

Being a rude and angry person whom is usually uneasy to please .

Matt is so cranky tonight, I think he has a case of salty butts.

by Facelessdreams April 18, 2015