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Closet-Crush

A person someone would never admit to having a crush on because of how much of a weird loser they are
Guy 1: “Oh what about Maddie?”
Guy 2: “Oh her naw she’s way to weird. But she’s hot enough to be my Closet-Crush.”
by xXxAngelCakexXx January 17, 2023
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dog closet

A place that is worse than the dog house. A place that James is put when Julie is mad at him and can be paroled for good behavior.
Did Julie put James in the dog closet again?! Wtf?!
by Bunny_Lopez February 3, 2021
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Closet-Goblin

A person who is said to be more attractive then he or she really is, or a person who seems more attractive thanks to the aid of cosmetics, clothing, poor lighting, etc.
Bob's new girl friend he's been bragging about is a closet-goblin.
by Tramov February 12, 2009
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closet deposit

Look at that hunk.

Wow wow wee whaaa! he's going in my closet deposit for later

spank bank flick the bean
by Qbaybay October 11, 2013
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Hanse’s Closet

When someone has bad fashion sense/is a fashion terrorist, people will refer to Hanse’s closet.
Joe: Look what he’s wearing!
Mary: It looks like it’s straight out of Hanse’s closet.

Joe: I know, right? How can someone own an article of clothing that ugly!
by subinsbf March 18, 2018
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closet jerk

someone who is only pretending to be nice to you but secretly doesn't like you. May ignore you, never include you and diss you in private with their closet jerk friends.
"He just politely shut me down with that irritating politician smile. What a closet jerk."
by Caaulolo September 16, 2020
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closet lobster

An individual who avoids public appearances or hanging out with friends because of an embarrassing sunburn or sunburn lines.
"Hey, have any of you seen Brittany since two days ago at the beach?"
"No, I think she is being a real closet lobster because I know she didn't use sunscreen."
by ThugZone August 16, 2013
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