peaceful john 

Giving a blow job to sleeping guy

Randy passed out but that girl was so hammered she gave him a peaceful john

peaceful john by moosewithdabiggoose June 22, 2014

Hand-john 

Getting a handjob while shitting

Laura was so drunk she agreed to a hand-john

Hand-john by Mapleleafsy July 7, 2014

attention john 

n., a person who gives an attention whore what he or she wants the most. This kind of person is required to keep the whole attention prostitution enterprise going.

Example:
Attention whore posts a picture of perfect semi-nude body with caption, "Nobody <3 me cuz im 2 fat. ;("
Attention john comments, "No, baby, you're beautiful in every way! I'm sure you are smart and kind and honest, too!"

attention john by perdix_ November 2, 2014

dapper john 

Dapper John is a legendary south Augusta Paremedic with the hair to prove it

That is one dapper John

That... is... dapper john

dapper john by Turtle907 February 10, 2017

Soggy John Travolta 

When a man hangs two to three soggy onion rings on his cock then receives oral sex or gives anal sex (using the grease as lube).

Dude! I gave my girlfriend a soggy John Travolta last night!

Soggy John Travolta by SweatyPopsicle March 27, 2017

Pie-john 

Native American,lazy Indian, usually Joe t...

You are a pie-john

Pie-john by Junheyy88 October 16, 2017

Teddy John 

Teddy John is straight up amazing. There is not anyone better. Teddy John always knows what to say to take your breath away. He loves to surprise you and sometimes scare you. He thinks it's funny. It is funny. He has the sexiest body and the best dick. It should win an award. He is a hard worker and loves his woman. He has at least 10 nicknames. He also nicknames his woman too, things like butta-fly or muffin. She is the luckiest woman in the world. Teddy John makes life wonderful. He loves meat and his favorite side dish is always smooth mashed potatoes. He likes to bang popsicles after dinner and cuddle on the couch. Usually he falls asleep on the couch and stumbles to bed later. He's got potential to be rich. Like really rich. Teddy John will steal your heart. He is loyal, more than a puppy. He has a sense of humor that will always have you laughing. The wit. None is better. If you find a Teddy John. Keep him close. Hold him tight. Treat him right. Love him ALLLLL night. He deserves the world. He does. He would give it to you. He will change your life.

Damn, who is that girl with?? He is so fucking fine.... oh, that's Teddy John. He has the best cock in the world. It's true. Look it up. It won an award.

Teddy John by Buttaflymuffin November 7, 2017