Holding in a fart won’t harm you. You're not going to explode or damage your gut, but sooner or later your body is going to get rid of that gas, so why not consider letting it go when it will have the most effect.
“Mikey got slung out of church!”
“Why?”
“Well, he knew fart fact 13 and was holding one in. The vicar got up to do the sermon and his text was from Proverbs, ‘I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes and cinnamon’ and Mikey let it go!”
“What happened?”
“Half of the people were outraged and half were pissing themselves, and Mikey got slung out.”
“Why?”
“Well, he knew fart fact 13 and was holding one in. The vicar got up to do the sermon and his text was from Proverbs, ‘I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes and cinnamon’ and Mikey let it go!”
“What happened?”
“Half of the people were outraged and half were pissing themselves, and Mikey got slung out.”
by AKACroatalin November 1, 2019
Get the Fart Fact 13 mug.If you think you fart a lot, guess again, you probably don't fart as much as you think you do. Often, people go to their doctor complaining of having too much gas, but chances are, they are just imagining it. These people are usually told to go home and keep a record of when they fart. Gastroenterologist Dr Michael Levitt found that most of these people fall within the normal range of farts per day (see fart fact 5) and merely need to be shown that they are normal.
by AKACroatalin October 27, 2019
Get the Fart Fact 6 mug.If you eat certain food groups they can make your farts smell worse. When you eat a lot of sulphur rich foods like eggs and meat, your farts will smell worse because met and eggs breaks down to create hydrogen sulphide, which leads to the emission of the so-called rotten-egg fart.
“Malcolm says he only eats meat, eggs and dairy products.”
“No wonder his farts stink so much, he’s living proof of Fart Fact 3”
“No wonder his farts stink so much, he’s living proof of Fart Fact 3”
by AKACroatalin October 27, 2019
Get the Fart Fact 3 mug.The shit-fart separator (AKA shitfart separator) is the muscle inside your colon, just above your bunghole, that is responsible for separating shits from farts. Usually a dormant muscle, the shit-fart separator is often only noticed if it's repeatedly squeezing and churning when one has diarrhea. The work of a healthy shit-fart separator usually results in dry farts.
I had bad diarrhea, and my shit-fart separator was in overdrive.
My shit-fart separator failed me and I accidentally sharted a little in my underwear.
My shit-fart separator failed me and I accidentally sharted a little in my underwear.
by Flambo Blumpkin February 14, 2008
Get the shit-fart separator mug.THE WINNING MOVE IN A CAGE FIGHT ITS WHEN THEY ARE IN ONE OF THEIR SWEAT COVERED CRAPPLING MOVES ROLLING AROUND LIKE TWO QUERRS TRYING TO FIND A HOLE TO FUCK AND AT JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT ALMOST NINJA LIKE ONE OF THEM FARTS MAKING THEIR RIVAL PASS OUT DUE TO LACK OF OXYGEN THATS WHAT MIXED MARTIAL FARTS IS A TRUE SPORT FOR THE BRAIN DEAD
MAN DID YOU SEE THAT DOUBLE FIST AND THAT CHOKE THE CHICKEN MOVE HE USED FOLLOWED BY A HOT RECTAL BLAST TO THE FACE NOW THATS TRUE TALENT I LOVE WATCHN MIXED MARTIAL FARTS ITS A GAS
by SHANNON MOTOWAKAN October 22, 2011
Get the MIXED MARTIAL FARTS mug.My mate promised me tickets for that gig tonight but he failed again as always, he's all fart no shit.
by Kev von rev the punk rock jock May 12, 2009
Get the All fart no shit mug.term which rivals "eat,pray,love" and is used to aptly describe a man's journey of discovery and quest for personal fulfillment........
The sequel to "eat,pray love" dealing with man's similar introspective journey for contentment is to be called eat,drink,fart.
by sheila in the car August 12, 2010
Get the eat,drink,fart mug.