The morbidly obese man that breaks into houses every year on December 24th and eats all of the food in your house. If you ever see him in your house, run. Santa Claus will give out presents to kids that he finds attractive and the ugly ones get coal. The presents usually have trackers in them as he handmade them with his children slaves that he kidnapped, also known as “elves”
Sometimes you may find some very small elves in your house. Dispose of them immediately because they have cameras in them. Santa isn’t your friend. He’s a child predator.
Sometimes you may find some very small elves in your house. Dispose of them immediately because they have cameras in them. Santa isn’t your friend. He’s a child predator.
*kid wakes up*
oh my goodness it’s santa claus and he is in my room
santa claus: ho ho ho get in my fabric sack
kid: *climbs into fabric sack*
santa claus: hahaha now you are my elf
kid: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
*the kid was forced to make toys until the end of time*
oh my goodness it’s santa claus and he is in my room
santa claus: ho ho ho get in my fabric sack
kid: *climbs into fabric sack*
santa claus: hahaha now you are my elf
kid: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
*the kid was forced to make toys until the end of time*
by SteeringWheelFaceReveal June 12, 2023
Get the Santa Claus mug.by swagmoneyemily69 October 25, 2019
Get the jaden santa mug.somewhat like a dirty sanchez. It's when a guy blows his load in his girl during anal sex then wipes his schlong on the girls face to make a white beard like santa.
by Matt October 13, 2004
Get the dirty santa mug.A stalker of small children.
A pervert of the kids.
A slave Driver of the elves.
A thief of the cookies.
A legal immigrant to the world.
A rebel without a cause.
Have you ever wonder what happens to children that wake up to find him?
He rapes them then bashes there heads again the chimney.
He watches you, Everywhere.
Him and God are bother helpless stalkers.
What do we do to this flying, fat, red blob of jolly madness?
I say we touch his jolly ass.
He's obviously a terrorist.
He isolates his workers so no one from our outside world could know,
That Santa has a thing for the butt.
Unscramble Santa.
And you get Satan.
Santa is the Devil.
Santa toke over Jesus Christs Birthday.
It's cause Santa is Satan.
He even wears Satan's theme color.
Red.
Also the color of Blood.
Scared Yet?
You should Be.
A pervert of the kids.
A slave Driver of the elves.
A thief of the cookies.
A legal immigrant to the world.
A rebel without a cause.
Have you ever wonder what happens to children that wake up to find him?
He rapes them then bashes there heads again the chimney.
He watches you, Everywhere.
Him and God are bother helpless stalkers.
What do we do to this flying, fat, red blob of jolly madness?
I say we touch his jolly ass.
He's obviously a terrorist.
He isolates his workers so no one from our outside world could know,
That Santa has a thing for the butt.
Unscramble Santa.
And you get Satan.
Santa is the Devil.
Santa toke over Jesus Christs Birthday.
It's cause Santa is Satan.
He even wears Satan's theme color.
Red.
Also the color of Blood.
Scared Yet?
You should Be.
Santa Clause:: Ho Ho Ho, Merry Christmas!
Kid:: I want a hot wheels toy set!
Santa:: I want to show you the toys in my master bedroom that has padlocks on the doors
Kid:: Yaaay!
Kid:: I want a hot wheels toy set!
Santa:: I want to show you the toys in my master bedroom that has padlocks on the doors
Kid:: Yaaay!
by Hawkington =]] February 2, 2008
Get the Santa Clause mug.“La Santa Muerte”, - Saint Death - is a kind of “divinity” created in México by narcotraffickers and illegal merchants. Saint Death is worshipped mostly by criminals, thugs, and drug dealers, but modern-day urban dwellers also invoke this saint for protection and the recovery of health, stolen items, or even kidnapped family members. Corrupt cops and politicians among Santa Muerte’s followers.
by Rodrigo Castilla November 16, 2006
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