Spider Monkey

A derogatory term used to describe an underweight person with spindly limbs and/or disproportionate facial features.

Georgette: "Barbara is looking too skinny these days."
Candace: "Tell me about it. She's a fucking Spider Monkey."

by Quattrodeuce September 24, 2009

punch the monkey

To click on a banner ad, in particular one that might load spyware/malware on your computer.

Idiot: My computer is full of popups and viruses.
Tech: Antivirus can't catch everything. Back off the sketchy porn sites, and don't punch the monkey.

by schflyatz March 28, 2010

grundle monkey

1.) The grundle monkey is a ravenous beast that hunts the gouch spider. See gouch spider for further explanations.

2.) Used to describe a compulsive lying monkey claiming to deserve three purple hearts, and a bag of poop. Slang for John Kerry.

1.) The grundle monkey is attacking!

2.) The grundle monkey is still attacking!

by Bob the Builder September 8, 2004

porch monkey

Porch Monkey is a lazy black African American that sits on a porch all day drinking, smoking weed, smoking crack, dealing drugs, or keeps a look out for police while commiting illegal activities while being on the porch.

There's a porch monkey doing something illegal.

by Southern Renegade September 24, 2016

Shank Monkey

A common Rhesus Monkey, jacked up on steroids and amphetamines with its hands sawed off and surgically replaced by retractable switch blades.
Often used by mad scientists as an outer security measure in their forest bound secret lairs.

Get the fuck out before I set the Shank Monkeys on you!

by yeti_detective September 8, 2010

monkey fisted

Act of being shafted, ripped off, screwed over.

I got $10 for a days work, I've been monkey fisted.

by Phil Archer September 19, 2007

skinned monkey

When a male skins the outer layer of his penis and proceeds to have anal intercourse.

" My girlfriend and I decided last night that we should try skinned monkey ..."

by Frightful hawk April 21, 2017