Hand-john

Getting a handjob while shitting

Laura was so drunk she agreed to a hand-john

by Mapleleafsy July 7, 2014

john straube

the kinda guy who laughs at his own jokes but its ok because theyre funny

hes laughing so hard at his own joke, such a john straube

by meeshmeeshk October 21, 2022

john laurens

the gayest mfer ever. him and alexander hamilton were so gay for each other it’s literally crazy. john laurens is literally the definition of gay. he’s also dead so it all makes sense

“i was up all night last night listening to ‘the story of tonight (reprise)’ and crying because john laurens really didn’t make it to see their glory”

“john laurens and alexander hamilton were so in love omg”

by johnlaurensxalexhamilton April 16, 2022

john sherlock

A three foot long turd weighing more than 200 pounds

I hadn't shit in a week so Sunday I took a John Sherlock

by Pops3423 August 6, 2017

John Alferdz

A walking gem.

The guy I like is John Alferdz.

by sheasagi February 21, 2022

Gorgeous john

The man, the myth, the legend. Professional beaver hunter, don’t forget to keep the lemonade.

“I wonder what happened to gorgeous John”
“He went out hard”

by Beanjuice52 September 1, 2022

John Ralphio

An adjective to describe a perfect man, the literal embodiment of heaven in a 6ft tall 6 packed man. He's got good looks, he's got charm and he's got athletic ability. He puts every other man to shame.

Person 1: "My golly gosh! That young fellow is quite attractive"
Person 2: "Yeah mate, he's like a proper John Ralphio isn't he"
Person 1: "yes"

by Ceazar November 1, 2016