Cabbage jesus

A overweight cunt who is full of life and loves to joke around with anyone. He loves to make friends and will even share his lunch with you. He will go out of his way for anyone!

Bro 1: did u just see that guy? he just gave the homeless family 100 dollars!
Bro 2: yeah! he always does that his name is cabbage jesus..
Bro 1: what a mad cunt we should meet him sometime..

Bro 2: hell yeah!

by Cabbage jesus May 12, 2019

Jesus Preschool

The stereotypical, faith-filled pre-elementary school that most small town children went to, typically held in a church basement. Includes cheese balls, prayer before snack, and 100 toddlers singing "Away in a Manger" for the yearly Christmas performance. Not limited to Protestant (Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, etc.) and Catholic locations.

Oh my gosh, you went to Jesus Preschool? So did I! Did you say *insert rhyming prayer here*, too?!

by maybelatergater September 5, 2016

Undeveloped Jesus

when someone has a terribly unfortunate face.

Fuck. Matt Is an Undeveloped Jesus. He is so fugly.

by Bee749 November 21, 2021

Jesus Speaking

The art of Jesus speaking,talking to dead people through a microwave.

Frank : What are you going to do today?
Anthony : I'm going to do some Jesus speaking
Frank : Who will you talk to?
Anthony : Actually whoever replies lol.

by Zxkred June 22, 2018

spicy jesus

when you are the only asshole in Mario party that has any coins or usually achieved by lying, cheating, stealing and griefing

Michael got a spicy jesus again after using the boo to steal Kevin's last few coins

by 1zaheer1 April 19, 2018

Jesus Of Suburbia

One of the best songs ever created. A song of the best band ever Green Day. It tells a story about the Jesus who is struggling with his life. I listen it so much it makes my parents crazy. So yeah go listen it!!!!

-what song are you listening to?
• Jesus of Suburbia

- is it good?
• yeah it’s like heaven to my ears.

by St.JimmyArmstrong December 27, 2021

jesus groupies

religious, but too religious. meet at hipster coffee shops and talk about israel and jesus over coffee.

i saw jesus groupies talking about jesus with every word being jesus.

by ahfdsafjiow October 23, 2017